Went back to work this week and dealing with new challenges. I had a sub cover my Monday evening GYROKINESIS® class, and took the class to see how it felt. While the movements felt fine muscularly (challenging but safe), the biggest problem I faced was the friction of the healing scar on my abdominals against my clothes! I only made it through part of the class, as the discomfort from this situation was overwhelming. I went straight to the drugstore where I bought some castor oil. It came highly recommended for healing scar tissue, and I've been massaging it onto the scar twice a day. Today I taught GYROKINESIS for the first time since the surgery, and it went well. Very soft sweatpants and shirt helped.
This was the first full hour of exercise I've had in a few weeks, and energetically it felt good. I moved a little slower than usual, and had more time than usual to assess where I was moving from. Especially when arching, because it's so challenging right now, I got a better feel for which muscles in the front and back body were engaging to make the motions happen. As someone who tends to hold tension in my abdominals, exploring ways to keep my solar plexus connected without restricting the arch is always a challenge, so this was a good experience and I know I have a long way to go.
Speaking of holding tension in the abdominals, I've noticed that when I completely relax my low belly, I get a dull ache in my low back, as well as some discomfort in my pelvic floor. I've been playing with gently engaging and trying to lengthen from a little higher up in the core (more like L2/3 instead of L5/S1), and I think it helps, but these muscles are still quite compromised. Also, I suspect my organs (which are still confused by the prescription laxatives I've been on since surgery) need to adjust and settle into a home a little lower down than they're used to, and this move is rather uncomfortable.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Post-Surgery
In the past I've dedicated this blog mostly to thoughts about the space and equipment at our studio, but a drought of material along those lines, and a recent unexpected event, have given me some more material.
Two weeks ago today I landed in the ER with severe internal bleeding, and quickly made it into the OR for surgery. Once the surgeons drained almost a gallon of blood and located the damaged blood vessel, they were abe to repair it pretty easily. Unfortunately along the way they had to slice open my entire abdominal wall. I have an incision above the belly button where they tried to go in laparoscopically, then another one from the belly button to the public bone where they had to open everything once they realized just how much blood was in the way. So while the original injury will be quick to heal, I had to spend a week in the hospital in bed, waiting for my body to wake up and get ready to move again, and for the cut to begin to heal. And it will be quite a road to recovery.
So I hope to share some of the highlights along the way, as they might be interesting for anyone who wants to understand how the body works, how it moves, and how it heals. The only definite restriction placed on my movement is no heavy lifting (over twenty pounds) for seven weeks. So I shan't be seeing my personal trainer for a while. Beyond that they told me to listen to my body and give the abdominals time and gentle encouragement to reattach and resume their role in my life. This is hard.
I've been experiencing a variety of sensations around the affected area. In the hospital I experienced lower back pain for the first time in my life. It took about a week to be able to stand up straight; my belly was so locked up at first when I tried to walk I was hunched way forward. When I tried a simple cat/cow on the floor, my best attempt at cow (spinal extension) got me about to a flat back, and I felt an intense stretch in my abdominals doing it.
So I'm trying to discern between healthy stretching and overdoing it. While the scar has been healing I've been careful about not ripping it open, and now that it's pretty much closed up I'm watching out for any movement that might herniate it by putting too much pressure outwards. With the incision going through the linea, the thing to watch out for is the compromised fascia that normally encases the muscle fibers. So I'm moving slowly and in any movements that engage the abdominals I'm making sure they go in rather than pressing out.
Then there are all the strange things I'm feeling from deeper layers. I can feel the scar tissue under the surface when I press along the side of the incision. There's also a strange bruised sensation around the low belly, especially to the left of the belly button where the actual injury was. While I was bleeding internally the most painful part was all the pressure that built up in the pleura level of tissue; the nerves running through the solar plexus sent intense radiating pain throughout my body, especially up into my shoulders. I suspect the pleura (which also had to be cut in order to get access to the burst blood vessel) is a bit in shock and will take time to heal up. My digestive tract had to get moved around quite a bit during surgery as well, and anesthesia and a week on morphine did a number on it, so I've been experiencing a lot of cramps, odd pulling, and dull aching feelings in there. And the occasional low back ache.
One morning this week I was lying in bed and turned onto my side, a position that was impossible for a while due to the pain in my abdomen. This time I felt discomfort, but I could tell it wasn't dangerous, and decided to give it some time to let my organs settle in that position. I felt what I imagined to be stretching scar tissue both close to the surface and a bit deeper, and I breathed as deeply as I could (not all that deeply) for a few minutes. Eventually the sensation died down. When I turned onto my back again I felt more open and relaxed than I had since the surgery, and since then have felt much more mobile. I decided to explore those movements that give me a similar feeling and try to breathe into them as I heal.
Two days ago I had a session with a wonderful bodyworker in the Alexander Technique, Robyn Avalon. Normally in my sessions with her we work on particular anatomy and movement ideas that I'm exploring, but this time I just laid on the table and let her use her hands to accelerate the healing process. She was able to release a lot of tension in my body very quickly, and also took me on a bit of a mental journey. I hadn't mentioned the low back pain to her, but she mentioned that it was a possibility in my future as a result of the surgery. She also suggested I could avoid this by choosing different movement patterns that are healthier. As she worked with her hands and looked off into space, I let my mind wander. Robyn talked about a fork in the road, where I would choose between the path that would lead to more pain, and one that would lead to greater ease. As she talked I meditated on a lot of the things that I thought about while I was in the hospital: What activities are important to me? Which relationships nurture me? What is the persona I am building and presenting to the world? Whenever I thought about the people and activities that I know in my heart are good for my development, Robyn had a strong reaction and said I was headed down the right path. Whenever I thought of self-destructive behaviors and people who are not good for me, she encouraged me to find the path again. Through all of this I was silent, but the connection between my spiritual health and physical health was so clear that I had a good cry.
Two weeks ago today I landed in the ER with severe internal bleeding, and quickly made it into the OR for surgery. Once the surgeons drained almost a gallon of blood and located the damaged blood vessel, they were abe to repair it pretty easily. Unfortunately along the way they had to slice open my entire abdominal wall. I have an incision above the belly button where they tried to go in laparoscopically, then another one from the belly button to the public bone where they had to open everything once they realized just how much blood was in the way. So while the original injury will be quick to heal, I had to spend a week in the hospital in bed, waiting for my body to wake up and get ready to move again, and for the cut to begin to heal. And it will be quite a road to recovery.
So I hope to share some of the highlights along the way, as they might be interesting for anyone who wants to understand how the body works, how it moves, and how it heals. The only definite restriction placed on my movement is no heavy lifting (over twenty pounds) for seven weeks. So I shan't be seeing my personal trainer for a while. Beyond that they told me to listen to my body and give the abdominals time and gentle encouragement to reattach and resume their role in my life. This is hard.
I've been experiencing a variety of sensations around the affected area. In the hospital I experienced lower back pain for the first time in my life. It took about a week to be able to stand up straight; my belly was so locked up at first when I tried to walk I was hunched way forward. When I tried a simple cat/cow on the floor, my best attempt at cow (spinal extension) got me about to a flat back, and I felt an intense stretch in my abdominals doing it.
So I'm trying to discern between healthy stretching and overdoing it. While the scar has been healing I've been careful about not ripping it open, and now that it's pretty much closed up I'm watching out for any movement that might herniate it by putting too much pressure outwards. With the incision going through the linea, the thing to watch out for is the compromised fascia that normally encases the muscle fibers. So I'm moving slowly and in any movements that engage the abdominals I'm making sure they go in rather than pressing out.
Then there are all the strange things I'm feeling from deeper layers. I can feel the scar tissue under the surface when I press along the side of the incision. There's also a strange bruised sensation around the low belly, especially to the left of the belly button where the actual injury was. While I was bleeding internally the most painful part was all the pressure that built up in the pleura level of tissue; the nerves running through the solar plexus sent intense radiating pain throughout my body, especially up into my shoulders. I suspect the pleura (which also had to be cut in order to get access to the burst blood vessel) is a bit in shock and will take time to heal up. My digestive tract had to get moved around quite a bit during surgery as well, and anesthesia and a week on morphine did a number on it, so I've been experiencing a lot of cramps, odd pulling, and dull aching feelings in there. And the occasional low back ache.
One morning this week I was lying in bed and turned onto my side, a position that was impossible for a while due to the pain in my abdomen. This time I felt discomfort, but I could tell it wasn't dangerous, and decided to give it some time to let my organs settle in that position. I felt what I imagined to be stretching scar tissue both close to the surface and a bit deeper, and I breathed as deeply as I could (not all that deeply) for a few minutes. Eventually the sensation died down. When I turned onto my back again I felt more open and relaxed than I had since the surgery, and since then have felt much more mobile. I decided to explore those movements that give me a similar feeling and try to breathe into them as I heal.
Two days ago I had a session with a wonderful bodyworker in the Alexander Technique, Robyn Avalon. Normally in my sessions with her we work on particular anatomy and movement ideas that I'm exploring, but this time I just laid on the table and let her use her hands to accelerate the healing process. She was able to release a lot of tension in my body very quickly, and also took me on a bit of a mental journey. I hadn't mentioned the low back pain to her, but she mentioned that it was a possibility in my future as a result of the surgery. She also suggested I could avoid this by choosing different movement patterns that are healthier. As she worked with her hands and looked off into space, I let my mind wander. Robyn talked about a fork in the road, where I would choose between the path that would lead to more pain, and one that would lead to greater ease. As she talked I meditated on a lot of the things that I thought about while I was in the hospital: What activities are important to me? Which relationships nurture me? What is the persona I am building and presenting to the world? Whenever I thought about the people and activities that I know in my heart are good for my development, Robyn had a strong reaction and said I was headed down the right path. Whenever I thought of self-destructive behaviors and people who are not good for me, she encouraged me to find the path again. Through all of this I was silent, but the connection between my spiritual health and physical health was so clear that I had a good cry.
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